Shin Megami Tensei: Persona of an Ashikabi, Yes, fan fiction, but I'm needing advertisement here... Options

[Xamusel]

Well, this ought to be interesting how this is received here, yet I would prefer it to be kept within general niceties... Also, I'm going to mention this at least once: You guys control the choices of the story and even the character's name, even though he's a canonical character in Sekirei (if you've seen that show or read the manga for it, you'd get the idea who I'm talking about after reading the bit that I have done, at any rate).

Keep in mind that it's rather short at the moment, but I only had a couple hours to write this, and not nearly enough to flesh it out more... Also, as soon as I can, I'll be expanding on what's written for word-count.

Anyway... here's the story as it is so far:

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Darkness… all I could see was darkness everywhere. That was the first thing that I could note when I awoke from what I thought was my untimely end… nothing but pure darkness clouding my vision for all around me, but nothing on me that would indicate that there was darkness all around. It should be noted that I am wearing a pair of blue jeans, a white shirt, a pair of brown shoes and a green coat over the shirt, and that I have dark brown hair and blue eyes with a rather cutesy face for a boy… something about how I was born a Bishounen by Kami-sama himself.

…That’s right, I was drowning trying to save a girl that was on the verge of drowning herself… I hope that the girl was saved somehow. I guess I forgot to kick my shoes off and throw away my coat when preparing to swim to save her… but I was in such a hurry as well. Well, at least I’m unable to know most of the things now, given how I’m actually dead right now…

Wait, I see something in the distance, but what is it? It’s an unusual sight; at least for the total darkness that I see here, but it’s some sort of light… a blue light to be honest about the situation. I certainly hope that Heaven could hold a better answer than this, as to where I am. I step over to the light, and what I find is interesting, to say the least… it’s as if there’s an office complex in here and I never noticed it before. Heading over to the complex, I note that there’s a door that leads to the CEO’s office, but underneath the label for the CEO’s office, it says something in gibberish, but I feel like I’ll be able to read it later.

As soon as I notice that there’s nothing else to investigate in the area, I open the door, and I notice a few things different from normal CEO offices. First off, I notice that everything is in blue fabric, except for the man at the desk, who wasn’t wearing anything blue. The second thing I noticed off was that the man was some sort of hunch-back with a balding head of white hair and an extremely long nose, one that wasn’t possibly normal. The third thing was that there was an attractive woman who could make any man desire to ravage her… unless they’re dead like me.

There were more things to note, but before I could get all the attention deserved to the different things, the man at the desk said something that I will never be able to forget, “Welcome to the Velvet Room, my esteemed young guest.”

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Prologue: A meeting within the Velvet Room that forges a new destiny

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As I stared at the man in front of me, my mind registered that this was a place called the Velvet Room, and that I was apparently a guest for the man. What I didn’t fail to miss was that he motioned for me to take a seat at the desk in front of him, which I understood to mean that I was in need of doing business with him, and that was something I figured would be needed some time down the road. Without question, I went over to the chair and sat down to see what I needed to know, which I hope was important before I passed on to heaven.

When I was given a moment to adjust to the leather seat, I was told by the man in front of me, “Ah… it’s so nice to see a guest after such a long time without one. My name is Igor, and I will be glad to answer any questions you have about this place, and about the journey you have.”

After a moment, I found my voice, and asked him, “Which way to Kami-sama from here, Igor-san?” What I was expecting was a direction to the final destination my soul would take, but what I got was laughter from the old man, who laughed for about a minute before he calmed down enough to speak again.

“I’m afraid that Death itself is not willing to take one who’s comatose,” he said as if it should be obvious what my condition is… and then it hit me, he said comatose! That means that I’m seeing this in a dream or something… though that doesn’t make sense.

After I compose my thoughts for a bit, I ask Igor, “So, could you tell me where I am, if not waiting for the ferryman?” Before he could answer, I amend the question, “I mean, where am I, at least outside of here, and where is here?”

With a bit of a wait between the question and his answer, I noted that he had a pleased look in his eyes, as if he was pleased that I worked out some of my situation now. Still, with no clues to go on, I’d be happy to grasp for as many straws as possible that held a clue to what I need to know, but I’d just as easily toss them away if they proved to be wrong information.

I must’ve shown the apprehension on my face, because Igor replied, “In your world, you are currently in a hospital bed waiting to awaken. However, currently you are in a place between dream and reality, mind and matter…”

…Okay, so I was in between the real and the fictional… that would make no sense to someone like my mom, who’s a scientist, but I’m willing to accept the reality of my situation. Currently I’m in a coma; I’m in a place that’s in a separate reality where my consciousness is at, and I’m about ready to know more about my current location and status. With a nod to Igor, I said to him, “I see what you’re saying…”

With a chuckle, Igor replied, “I’m glad that you’re one with an open mind. Now, then, do you have much interest in the occult?”

With a raised eyebrow, I respond, “I’m planning on being a scientist like my mother is, Igor-san, but I don’t suppose that would apply to here, would it? I mean, I’m hoping to eventually find the answer to if there’s life on other planets, as that’s a major goal in my life to prove to others around me.”

“Indeed,” Igor replied, as if he was interested in my career choice. When he spoke next, it seemed as if it was completely off-topic, but all the more on it as well, “I would like to introduce to you my assistant, Yume. I believe that she has something important to say.”

Turning to the brown-haired beauty, I noted that her eyes were also brown and that her figure was a perfect hourglass… wait, I mustn’t be perverted at this time! After shaking my head to clear the thoughts, I noticed that her gaze was locked with mine, and that she was about to speak. When she spoke, it was rather enlightening to me, and yet it was in a sad tone of voice, “My name is Yume, and I am a species of alien your kind has dubbed Sekirei, though we are more human in appearance than anything.”

Ah… now I understand. I guess that humanity had evolved better in other places than Earth. I just hope that the Sekirei don’t try to invade the planet or something like that… and I’ll be rather peeved if it turns out that they already did a long time ago!

“Ah,” Igor spoke up, seeming to remember something, “I almost forgot to ask for your name. Could you please fill the contract which you must abide by? From there, I will be able to tell you you’re fortune, my esteemed and young guest.”

…My name? I hope I remember it after all that happened to me in the coma and with the drowning incident. If I recall correctly, my name is…

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Yeah, that's all I have so far, so... please give options for the name if you have any...

This post has been edited by Xamusel: Nov 11 2011, 10:40 PM

[X-M-O]

Does the name have to be Japanese?

It sounds interesting, though I have no clue what's going on (don't know the story of Shin Megami Tensei, but I think that's a game I was looking at buying the other day on my PSP).
Anyway, needs some more work, but it seems to be coming along nicely. =]

[Xamusel]

Not necessarily a strict Japanese Name, for example, I was given a vote for the name Rock Hikari... the other votes so far were Glory E. Faith and Fag Bals... the latter I'd rather not have him named.

At least this was off-site, I'm thinking of putting this onto FanFiction.Net after I get some feedback for how the story goes for a while, and I only had a couple hours to write this originally... in the middle of the night.

Besides, this is more breaking the canon of the story it's crossed over with, which is Sekirei. I have the beginning all planned out, but I don't have everything ready for a proper ending.

[X-M-O]

Ah ok. =]

I wasn't 100% clear on whether the main character is a girl (trying to follow after her mother?) or a guy ("saving a girl from drowning" and "similar to appearance as L from Death Note").

[Xamusel]

Okay, you know what, I'm going to fix that first post up... I should've done so sooner, but I couldn't, so...

At any rate, I'll be busy fixing it for when it's released on all the possible sites I can release this on, so I'll be giving you guys this before then when it's cleaned up.