Screenshot Critique, Please read first post Options

[kayden997]

So, your first reaction might be "WHAT? IT'S BACK," or "Don't we have a thread for this," or somewhere in between.
Allow me to explain.
As you may have heard, the old screenshot thread was taken down due to people not posting actual advice on another's work. Now I know some would love to 'receive' actual advice so I thought we should see how this would work out the second time over.

Titan hasn't been around lately to moderate the Screenshot Showoff thread. Most of you should know that it's a place where you can post your finer work for others to look at. But some don't want to show off their work without the typical "how does this look." leading to the next person critiquing. That means that he/she is not done it but needs advice in order to "be" done.
The purpose of that thread is to show your best to the people who come to look for inspiration from the very best; you. But how can they be sure it's the very best if they realize you just said "does this look good here," and thus has to read the next post to find out the solution.

The main purpose of this is to post your maps you believe needs a second look before finalizing. Anything theory based, create a topic for it.

If you have any questions, feel free to send me a message detailing your concern
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So what do we do now? How do we get our advice?
Simple, the Screenshot Critique thread.

Here you can post your maps, battles, title pages, anything in-game related you believe needs advice. Post what should be done next or ask for recommendations on something.
What are the rules?
- You must post critique to the previous image before you post your own.
- Posting an image is optional, but you must post critique (no chit chat, PM each other).
- All other forum rules apply

Last words: this is only a test to see how far we can go without breaking the rules. If all goes well... it's here to stay.

And remember, spoiler boxes for big images.

[Zinx10]

I have a lack of skill when it comes to indoor mapping. Any suggestions on my map below (NOTE: It is a train)?



This post has been edited by Zinx_therpgmaker: Jun 4 2012, 11:59 PM

[supercow]

@Zinx_therpgmaker
i think it looks good
it really depends on your choice of setting of place
how about adding window , getting rid of barrel/wooden crate , change the seat so it looked more like train
i wanted to add pole for standing up ppl, but dunno if it fits your setting era of your game

[Show/Hide] :D

[Zinx10]

@Zinx_therpgmaker
i think it looks good
it really depends on your choice of setting of place
how about adding window , getting rid of barrel/wooden crate , change the seat so it looked more like train
i wanted to add pole for standing up ppl, but dunno if it fits your setting era of your game

[Show/Hide]

Thanks! This current part of the game is in a terrible future. You are soldiers trying to complete a mission while trying to survive.

Is this any better?

[amerk]

This version of the train looks much better than the first. While the first was loaded with details, it detracted from what the image was supposed to be.

[Saul95]

Well in a nutshell is ... empty.
I know the chipset, and you can do better, try adding some light, or some manifest.
Among other things, the windows do not give the effect due, to fill even those you may put a track that is seen from the windows.
Something like this:

[Zinx10]

Well in a nutshell is ... empty.
I know the chipset, and you can do better, try adding some light, or some manifest.
Among other things, the windows do not give the effect due, to fill even those you may put a track that is seen from the windows.
Something like this:
-snip-

I think your chipset is different from mine for you have items that I do not.
This is my chipset:


If any of you know a better chipset, please tell me.

[Saul95]

Here it is, but there is not much difference between this and your:

Try adding some elements of this chipset that you have now.

[Zinx10]

I see a huge difference! Thanks!

[Saul95]

Please, show us and the end result

[Zinx10]

Is this better?


This post has been edited by Zinx_therpgmaker: Jun 6 2012, 05:11 PM

[kayden997]

Much better. It does illuminate the subway feel.
Great job so far.

[Saul95]

Much better
Now you can also change the windowskin wanting.

[Yuu-Mon Musuedo]

Very nice Zinx. I can find nothing wrong with it other then the bright windowskin. Are you planning it to making the map that dark though? I kind of think it could use a little light, but somehow keep it dark.

This is the first screenshots of my first VX Ace game. I think the hallway looks nice, but I could always use some criticism to improve. The other two pictures is one classroom. I'm trying to bring the feel and look of a everyday Japanese high school setting, since my story takes place in Japan.

 SMS_000.png ( 84.06K ) Number of downloads: 42
 SMS_001.png ( 111.66K ) Number of downloads: 31
 SMS_002.png ( 122.3K ) Number of downloads: 21


This post has been edited by Yuu-Mon Musuedo: Jun 6 2012, 09:59 PM

[Zinx10]

The classrooms are great, but the hallways need to be improved--as you said. To improve them, try adding lockers. From what I have experienced, middle schools and high schools have lockers. Not sure about Japanese schools, but I assume the same. As for your comment on my picture: the train is meant to be dark for the electricity is off. You have it off so you don't alert any bandits who are hiding on the train. You have to explore the train first before turning the train on. Once the train is on, the lights will be activated, thus it will be brighter.

[supercow]

@Yuu-Mon Musuedo
-The hallway-
1.the space is too wide, you could play football there
2.maybe better if the window had some space between them instead cluttering all window together
3.i prefer window on the outside of the class so other can look inside ,but its ppl preferences anyway
.or at least make some little window outside classroom
4.looks a bit empty with all that space, add some things like a locker/table/place for trophy /etc school stuff
5.classroom door had a piece missing

good one
1.board outside classroom looks good

-Classroom-
1.floor tile is too reflective , maybe to other ppl its fine, but to me somehow its ...annoying
2.window classroom to outside is too big and too cluttered , + its all the way to the ground?
3.the chair looks different than the other
4.is it me or the book is ..unusually big

[LaDestitute]

Some more:



This post has been edited by LaDestitute: Jun 10 2012, 12:18 AM

[Vexus]

It's not bad of a menu or whatever it is but in my opinion it has far too many colours that could distract a little from the view.

Also the font doesn't match the style your trying to portray. I suggest you find a more cartoonish font that is one static colour not going from dark to light.
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I'm trying to make a ventilation vent map with what I could find by searching and editing a little and came up with this:

[Show/Hide] "

Is it fine like this or I should add some more stuff? (Maybe different graphics for the holes?)

This post has been edited by Vexus: Jun 10 2012, 08:34 AM

[LaDestitute]

Looks nice, but the you could use more realistic looking holes. They look like someone just lazily made them in mspaint.

[Vexus]

Well it's a resize I did from the big hole, ingame it looks like this at 10 am until I edit it a little more:



Edited it a little to have the same texture of the ceiling on the floor.

This post has been edited by Vexus: Jun 10 2012, 09:26 AM