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> Sparrowsmith makes music?, Yes, apparently.
Sparrowsmith
post Aug 4 2012, 01:33 PM
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ROROW was here, went for beer
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So I recently got into using FL studio (I used to compose using Logic and I missed doing that) and I've been playing around with stuff. I've made a handful of tracks with no particular aim (okay, I have ideas for some, but nothing set in stone) and I've been dying for some criticism, real no punches held criticism. However, after weeks of searching, it never once occurred to me to post here.
So here I go, posting and shiz like that.

The music is all MIDI based (though I might record some stuff at a later date) and most of it are works in progress.
First up: DSTM Remix a remix of the bassline from a song me and a friend composed a long time back. It's mostly just me experimenting with gross beat. I'm thinking of lowering the tempo slightly, and I have another section in the works for it.
Next: DataBase my personal favorite and the one I'm most looking for criticism on. I personally find it to be pretty damn groovy, but I know I'm biased.

I can't say I sound as professional as some people, but hey, practice makes perfect, right? wink.gif
There's another track on my soundcloud (restless world) but I won't link it because there's just something off about it and I don't think it's ready for public listening. I'm also working on a darker version of database (or a melody from database to be exact) so I might put that up soon depending on when I make progress on it (stuck at the 25 second mark).
Anyway, I hope this isn't like hideously bad or something. Enjoy.


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Kaust
post Aug 5 2012, 03:19 AM
Post #2


Level? Where we're going we don't need levels.
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The intro of DSTM is too stuttery, the same riff works well later on and its clear you want it to be emphasised at the start but you should really consider opening it alongside a quiet sustained note. On the whole I like the track, there's something AVALANCHE (from FF7) about it.

Database ended far too abruptly. Had something psychological about it but I think you use too many movements. It sounds great as is but it could use something, structure isn't the right word, I dno, I don't think you capitalise on any of your movements I guess, their always building up to the next one and then the song ends. There's great use of repetition throughout and the movements overlap well and it all feels like its building towards something but then it just ends- so I'd say write something in a different scale, stick it in where there's a tonal centre and emphasise it with a much needed refrain. I kinda feel like that would change the style of the song too much though and like said, it sounds good as is.


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Sparrowsmith
post Aug 5 2012, 05:58 AM
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ROROW was here, went for beer
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You're right about database building up and not paying off. I've basically just started doing this properly and the idea of working in two different scales at once is frankly terrifying, but I'll give it a go laugh.gif
I don't mind changing the feel of the song at all. I'm mostly just practicing at the moment. Sort of like audio doodles. I'll make something more solid once I have the talent.

I wasn't expecting DTSM to get compared to AVALANCHE, but I can kind of hear it. I think you're definitely right about the sustained note and the stuttering intro. Overall this is some really great feedback, thank you so much biggrin.gif


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X-M-O
post Aug 5 2012, 05:31 PM
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I think the tempo in the DTSM remix could be reduced to help it a little, but other than that I'm not really experienced enough to offer better critique there. =]

I'd have to agree with Kaust when it comes to Database, however I do think that aside from what Kaust mentioned, the volume level of the primary instrument you use needs to be slightly reduced (it is overbearing by comparison to the other instruments, which makes it sound less professional). Other than that, the balancing is slightly off (for stereo sound) which may be due to some tweaking you did or it may be the timing of the instruments' use.
Overall, I thought it was interesting enough, and sounded cool, though it's tempo almost BEGS for some more bass (just don't overdo the bass, if you do make changes there). wink.gif


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