Two chapters of novel, Genre: Humor, Fantasy Options

[syr]

I can't reveal any of my novel, since its currently being read by an agent at Adams. And some of my short stories are in still in que for literary mags, so I can't post those in there. But I do want to share two chapters of Nawm, the next in line that will be published after my first series, The Destined. If anyone shows true interest in this, (remember,it's in a beta stage and hasn't been revised as much as The Destined)
and asks for more chapters, than I'll be happy to post more. So far, I've only written up to six.

(I noticed the formatting changes when I past it from WORD, so forgive me if this annoys you.)

Nawm Book One

I’m what you call, a true vampire…

Prologue

Message before world domination…
The winds raged in this open field of death. The darkened sky only spoke one message –a message known as “the death of the hero.”
Oh, did I disappoint you? I may as well did. You people always craved modern-time stories in the point of view of the hero, but you’re missing a lot. I’m probably the only villain that actually succeeded. But it wasn’t easy, especially when you’re living in a city of morons who think of life as an average gopher. For example, they get a certain job at a company, make an average amount of money, get a wife and then have kids. But never once did that man succeeded in life. Moron.
I’m going to be perfectly honest with you. The hero defeated me several times. But he cheated. After all, how the heck could a mortal human honestly defeat someone of my stature? I’m just not a vampire that can be defeated easily!
So I’m fed up with it. I’m killing the hero when he doesn’t expect it. You see, I’ve developed immunity to the sun's rays. Nobody knows this ... yet.
I cannot, however, dominate this world alone; no--I’m going to need some help. I am definitely going to need some help...

Chapter 1: Me
“Please, I’m begging you!” the blonde woman cried. “Please. Don’t hurt me.”
I grinned. The night air smelled so good. It was ten times cleaner than the day air and it looked better. The blonde woman had fear bundled in her blue eyes. This tickled me.
“Oh don’t cry,” I laughed. This dark alley between several buildings made the scene seem so tense. No matter how much she screams, nobody will be here to save her. Not even the hero.
I snatched the blonde from off the ground. “You human are all alike. Pleading and begging for your life. Well guess what? You get no mercy from me.”
I plunged my teeth deep into her neck, ignoring her scream. She went still after a few seconds. Her juicy, thick red blood was savory and delicious. She was the first victim tonight that didn’t have blood that tasted of alcohol.
After I finished my drink, I aimed a hand at the body and flexed my arm muscle. I could feel the power racing through my veins like horses. The fireball smashed into the lifeless human like a meteor. The body became engulfed in flames and burned away a few seconds later.
I felt refreshed. I probably could run for days, nonstop in “human conditions” without tiring. There was nothing like the blood of a pure human.
I leapt to the rooftop of a building that glowed with red and pink lights. I heard music banging so loud, vibrations swat at my feet with every step. This was just another typical nightclub.
Maybe I could hang around and catch another meal before it became intoxicated. And believe me, there was nothing more foul tasting than intoxicated blood.
It didn’t take me long to spot my prey. She walked toward the back alley of the club carrying a large garbage bag. She looked exhausted. I assumed she worked at the nightclub.
I quickly leapt from the rooftop and landed ten feet behind her. When she turned around, she was startled.
“Oh my god, you scared me!”
“Hello there,” I said. “How’s the night air going for you?”
She hesitated to speak at first. “It’s tiring,” she said. Her hair was golden brown and her eyes matched. I couldn’t wait to see the bloodshot red that would ooze from them when I feasted.
“Well, I’d better get back to work. Have a great night.” The nervousness in her voice almost made me laugh.
“Oh I will. But unfortunately, you won’t.” Bingo. Her face shot to pale.
“Look sir, I don’t want any trouble. Or I’ll call the police.”
I chuckled. “You can if you want. But it wouldn’t do any good. Your blood is as good as gone.”
“You’re insane!” She snarled.
“I know and I love it,” I laughed. She attempted to run but I grabbed her arm. I grinned revealing my fangs. She screamed. My teeth edged closer to her neck. However, I paused when I heard a voice.
“Let her go.” I knew it was the hero.

Chapter 2: The Hero
I looked at him with a mocking grin. He was a brown-haired teenaged boy, wearing a white t-shirt and jeans. His eye color was light green, just like mine. His blood only matched half of mine. Yes, he was a half-breed. One that could survive either on human food or blood –but I’m sure everyone knows what side he chose. What an imbecile.
“Well, well, you finally show up. You were a bit late for my first victim.”
“Ted,” the woman said.
“Don’t worry, Julie. Nawm will not be harming you.” Ted wasn’t his real name. But it didn’t matter, because he was going to die anyway.
“Well, ‘Ted.’ We’ll just see about that.” I pushed the woman out of the way and darted at him. I threw a left hook. Ted blocked it and knocked me back with his own.
“What’s the matter Nawm? You used to be a lot tougher. Don’t tell me you’re getting rusty.”
“I’ll show you rusty.” I charged some heat into my palms and lurched after him. He dodged my first two fireballs; however, I managed to hit him with the third. I chuckled when his back hit the ground.
“Do you think that just because some old lady tells you that I’m destined to be defeated by you, I’m supposed to lose by the minute we fight? I came to this time era for a reason. And that bastard, Okawn sent you after me.”
The woman, Julie looked confused. I snapped my fingers, creating an intense sound. Ted attempted to get up but fell to his feet covering his ears. The super high-pitched sound knocked the woman unconscious.
I walked over to Ted and kicked him to his back. “It seems like the hero has just failed.” I gathered more heat into my hands and took aim. When I concentrated, the heat formed into a fireball. It was so bright, when I unleashed it, I couldn’t see the hero’s body. When the light cleared, Ted was nowhere to be found.
I finally took down the hero, after all of these years! I had only one purpose in this time and the hero wasn’t going to stop me. I turned to the woman. She was still unconscious. I started to walk toward her but suddenly a large beam of green light shot from nowhere, halting me where I stood.
“Don’t even think about it.” Ted stood on the rooftop. I clenched my first together. This annoying half-breed just didn’t know when to die. I felt like my last attack was just ripped off.
“You don’t know when to fall, do you?” I said.
“Nawm, evil will never prevail over good.” Ted’s eyes began to glow. I knew what was coming and hated this so much. Why did heroes get sudden ‘special powers,’ or ridiculous boosts?
I snarled.
“I already know what’s coming. This is getting old, so until next time, farewell half-breed.”
From that point, I leapt onto the rooftop and fled.

***

I banged my first against a table of the abandoned funeral home. I couldn’t take this any longer. I never win! I had always lost. The hero even wins in this period: modern times.
The dark gem was located somewhere in this city and of course finding it in this time period without any dragon problems made it easier. Back in my own era, angels, trying to purify it, guarded it. However, the gem was too dark to become good, containing infinite evilness. It was the key of my victory. Only one pest stood in my way and that was Adius, or ‘Ted.”
I opened a coffin and lay inside. I couldn’t do this alone. Adius had the ability to sense whenever I opened a time wave and I knew he was after the time gem I possessed.
I couldn’t win this. I could never win. No. I was destined to lose this battle. But that was….if I remained a loner.
I sat up. Maybe there was a way I could trick destiny. I couldn’t beat the hero alone –but if I could gather some allies, he’d be finished in no time. I was going to need a dragon keeper. Of course, I’d have to leave this period and return home. The dark gem will be mine and I had a plan to retrieve it.

This post has been edited by syr: Jun 7 2011, 10:20 AM

[Fat Panda]

Not to be rude, but based on the subject matter of this piece, I dont see it getting published anytime soon. It's written towards the demographic of a 7th grade anime-fan girl.